She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
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