Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
