doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
We have started to decorate penises.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
