I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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