GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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