if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
