Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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