Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
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