I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Your dad touched me again.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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