We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
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