You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
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The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
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also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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