doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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