Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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