Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
You smell like a Billy Joel song
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
