I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Randomize