Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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