How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
