Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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