I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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