No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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