So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
