She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
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there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
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