Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
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He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
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I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize