If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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