I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
