I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
