David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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