i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
