Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
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