I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
