Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
