She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
