This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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