Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
im six kinds of drunk right now
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
