Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
