Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
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Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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