So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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