all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
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