I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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