Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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