I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
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she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
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Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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