i don't like sucking hair
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Randomize