Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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