In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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