I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
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