When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
