I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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