im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize