I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize