Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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