new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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